caught somewhere between real life, simple faith, & raw emotion
Quotes
Quote of the Week on Hate
215 years
Here is the quote of the week. It’s from the intro of my book explaining Why Hate?
“I’m pretty good at most things I put my mind to, but not really amazing at anything. I’m also not very lucky. I’ve never been in the right place at the right time. I can’t help you get a crazy deal on a set of tires, and I’ve never won an all-expenses-paid cruise to Cozumel. I find myself just having to work hard at every little thing in life.”
And here is a little something I did explaining when it can be good to hate. What? That’s right. I said it can be good to hate.
Quote of the Week on Church
715 years
Quote of the week from my book. It’s from the chapter on Church:
“You’ve probably set foot in a church at some point in your life, be it Easter or Christmas, or a friend invited you. Afterward, one of two things happened: Something unexplainable appealed to you and you decided to go back; or, more likely, it didn’t pique your curiosity and you never returned.
There was a reason the church you visited was like it was. Whether you realized it or not, that church fit into one of the following descriptions: traditional, contemporary, charismatic, Pentecostal, evangelical, postmodern, purpose-driven, seeker-sensitive, emergent, emerging, missional—there are more, but that’s enough for my purpose. The thing is, none of that probably mattered to you. You may not even have known all those existed, let alone what they meant.
What probably did matter to you was whether you felt welcomed by the people there and could understand what the pastor or preacher or priest or bishop was saying. At least that’s how I felt, thinking back to churches I’ve visited over the years. Those were the reasons I either did or didn’t go back.”
Quote of the Week On Love
015 years
Here is my quote of the week. It is from my book on the chapter on Love:
“But nothing’s more important in this life than love. Life minus love equals zero.”
Quote of the Week On Rules
015 years
Here is my quote of the week from my book. It is from the chapter on Rules:
“…I’m old enough now to understand some [rules]. Not because I totally agree philosophically, but because I’ve learned their value the hard way, through the high-priced tuition my experiences have exacted.”
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Quote of the Week On Prayer
015 years
Here is my quote of the week. It’s from my book on the chapter on Prayer:
“Everybody knows long distance relationships (LDRs) usually don’t work. The love interest you had in the Niagara Falls area probably isn’t the person you married and had kids with. The odds are stacked against it. I’ve met a few couples that started out as LDRs and managed to finish well together, but it’s rare.
I find trying to build closeness with God through prayer is ten times worse than any other LDR. It’s an LDR that spans not only the world, not just the universe, but even different dimensions. I mean, who exactly am I talking to? Where is he? Ground control to Major God! Do you hear me? I sure don’t hear you.”
Quote of the Week On Hate
115 years
Here is the quote of the week from my book. It comes from the introduction as I discuss hate:
“The truth remains: Life is a constant battle. If we’re to experience any peace, joy, or love as we learn to do life and relationships more successfully, our only option is to learn to fight our inner demons. We can’t give up.
I hate all this tension, and I hate having to deal with it. It’s a dilemma wrapped in a crisis stuck between a rock and a hard place.
But I’ve learned that this deep inner conflict can be a positive force. It can lead to a breakthrough and the opportunity for much-needed personal growth and renewal. We can train our minds to use our hate, and when we begin to sense it, we can create forward momentum: we sense the tension, wrestle with the issue, win the battle, learn a lesson, grow as an individual, and move ahead. This brings a new day with a new perspective and new opportunities.”
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Quote of the Week On Sin
015 years
I’m back from traveling and getting back to my routine. So here we go. Here is my quote of the week from my book. It’s on my chapter on sin. Not a pretty subject. But if you are going to talk about the Christian faith, you’ll have to discuss sin:
“We’ve all been there. Maybe it’s tax season in a tough year, and we consider fudging the numbers a little. Or we’re preparing a résumé to apply for a desperately needed job, and we’re tempted to exaggerate some qualifications and stretch our experience a little. Not lies, of course— just a little creativity with the truth.
These moments reveal something about my character that I try to ignore. Some call it their bad sides, or alter egos. Dr. Jekyll called it Mr. Hyde. I just can’t understand why I’m so easy to convince when it comes to doing something wrong. Bad habits catch on so much quicker than good ones. What’s with that? I hate it, and I hate myself for it.”
Quote of the Week on Love
115 years
Here is my quote of the week on love, in light of my thoughts on the separation of John & Kate and how it will adversely affect the 8 kids they have. It’s also a good time to talk about love as one of the best love song writers of all times (Michael Jackson) has died.
From chapter 6 of my book:
“I’m always on my mind. I have been for a long time. Ever since I can remember, I’ve been thinking about myself. Most of us do…
…To make matters worse, our culture’s literature, movies, poems, songs, and the like constantly reinforce our self-love. “Love yourself,” they insist. “Make sure you’re happy.” But happily ever after isn’t real life. Surrendering to that whimsical emotion is reckless and selfish. What do I do when the rush wears off (because it always does)? Do I set out to conquer a new love and ignore the consequences of this pattern?
So, I’ve had to unlearn and then relearn what it means to love. And it hasn’t been easy.”
Quote of the Week On Rules
015 years
Here is my quote of the week. It is from my book on the chapter Rules:
“I’ve concluded there are two types of people in this world. There are the goody-two-shoes who like rules and take great pride in creating and obeying them. And there are the other people. The ones who like to rebel. The ones who never saw a rule, standard, or principle they didn’t salivate to defy. They like breaking rules.
I hate rules. Like most people, I decide when I want to follow them. I love that autonomy. Most of us do. We’re not going to let anyone or anything tell us what to do or how to do it.
I tend to push against rules because I don’t always see their benefits in the moment. But even if I could, it probably wouldn’t matter. I want to do what I want to do when I want to do it.
And if just one rule gets me edgy, what about dozens?
It didn’t take long before I got the impression Christianity was filled with rules. Jesus I found compelling, but I started to wonder why someone would ever want to be a Christian with all those rules that seemed to go with the territory.”
Quote of the Week On Hell
015 years
Here is my quote of the week. It is on my chapter on Hell in my book:
“It’s no secret that hell is probably the most uncomfortable aspect of the Christian faith. For many years I was content to ignore it and simply think, Everyone goes to heaven. When that stopped making sense—in light of the evident evil in this world—my conclusion evolved into this: Good people go to heaven, bad people go to hell. But that started to break down, too, as I realized that “good” is measured on a sliding scale, and everyone has a different standard. Some twisted minds even view obvious evil actions as good.
I realized I had to do some more investigating of this idea of hell, though I wondered what good could come from it. To say that I hate hell, and that I especially hate talking about it, is a huge understatement. But if I’m going to find the true value in the teachings and person of Jesus (and the Bible), I have to deal with this issue.”
Quote of the Week On Love
015 years
Although I am in Pittsburgh doing a TV interview in a couple hours, I wanted to put up a quote of the week. This one comes from my book on the Chapter on Love:
“Learning about love has been an ongoing process, something I’ve had to suffer through many times. Sure, there’s great irony in having a chapter here on hating love. It’s not that I hate love in and of itself. Who in his right mind would? I love being loved, as we all do. That’s not the issue.
More accurately, it’s loving I hate. I hate having to always be loving. I hate having to be loving toward people I’d much rather ignore. I hate to love like Jesus taught, modeled, and prayed that we would all imitate. To truly love, I always have to be “on.” I hate having to work at loving. I hate the process and practice of what Jesus laid out. I’d much rather love who I want, when I want.
I’d much rather go with the feeling called love. If I feel it, I’ll do it. If I don’t, I won’t. That’s easier. But that’s emotion, not love.
If there’s one thing the life of Jesus taught us, it’s that love is a choice. It seems like it shouldn’t be so much work, but it is. A lot of the time, we just have to muscle through it.
Love is unnatural that way.”
Quote of the Week on the Bible
615 years
Here’s my quote for the week. It’s from Chapter 3 of my book on the Bible:
“I started to wonder if the Bible was nothing more than the tool of rich and powerful white guys in the past that refined it to fit their personal agendas (you know, to suppress other ethnic groups and women) and maintain their status quo.
Or was it just the record and musings of a bunch of beatniks smoking dope and writing their hallucinations down? That’s what some people say about the Bible, and it’s hard not to believe it when you’re having your own doubts. There seems to be so much you have to overlook in order to believe it. I hate that I can’t figure it all out.
In more optimistic moments, I’ve tried sharing some of the truths I’ve learned from the Bible, but this seems to highlight the problem even more. There’s an awkward tension, as if I’m trying to explain the plot of some obscure cult classic movie like Blade Runner: “No really, Harrison Ford is also a Replicant! He’s not even human, but you have to see the director’s cut to totally get it.” (That’s not true. The director’s cut is even more confusing.)”
Quote of the Week On Church
115 years
Here is my quote of the week. It’s from Chapter 9 of my book on Church:
“I’m convinced most human beings are innately curious about spiritual things. We recognize there’s a spiritual element to life that can’t necessarily be explained; yet, it’s there nonetheless. We can even be drawn to it unknowingly.
After all, being part of a playoff baseball game in a stadium full of people is a spiritual experience of sorts. That’s how I felt when the Red Sox finally won the World Series in 2004. I’m not even their fan, but I was rooting for them with my friend Bob, who’s diehard, and who told me they hadn’t won it since 1918. I was moved to my core with the rest of the fans when their team finally broke the “Curse of the Bambino.”
Getting a sneak peak at a highly anticipated movie in a packed theater can also be a spiritual experience. In 1997, when my wife and I were dating, we got tickets to a preview showing of Titanic. It was intense, and the theater was silent the entire three hours. We all walked out quiet and somber. Without a doubt, it was spiritual like no other movie, which is why it’s still the highest grossing release of all time.
Watching your favorite band at a sold-out show can be a spiritual experience too. It was for me when I saw U2 on their Joshua Tree tour at the Orange Bowl in Miami back in 1987. It was amazing. It took hours for the stadium to empty out because no one wanted to leave. We were moved deep down and didn’t want it to end.”
Quote of the Week On Christians
1215 years
Here is the quote of the week. It’s from Chapter 10 of my book on Christians. I thought it would be appropriate considering the strange emails I’ve been getting:
“Christians speak in ways that don’t make sense. If you tell them you’re being laid off at work, they might respond, “Everything happens for a reason.” As if that’s exactly what you needed to hear.
Or if your child is facing emergency surgery, a Christian might tell you, “All things work for good for those who love the Lord.” Or if it’s their own child, they might even say, “Praise the Lord!” or “I’m trusting God!” You feel like some Christians think they don’t have problems like everyone else. It’s annoying and alienating, because it’s not always genuine.
And if that isn’t enough, Christians want to talk about things that don’t fit the conversation or that you don’t want to talk about. Maybe you just want to go out for a cup of coffee and talk normal, about normal things, with normal responses. But you feel like they’re just waiting for an opportunity to turn the conversation and try to “convert” you. Like, “Oh really? You mowed your lawn yesterday? That reminds me of something Jesus said about farming and about people who are going to hell.” You think, Just shut up or go away.
Christians can come off as distant—like they don’t live in the real world with the rest of humanity. You want to send them a postcard with a picture of earth and write on the back: Wish you were here!“
Quote of the Week On Prayer
115 years
Since the National Day of Prayer was yesterday, I thought it would be appropriate to have my quote of the week on prayer. It comes from chapter 2 of my book:
“Even the hard-line atheist calls on God before rear-ending the car in front of him at full speed: “Oh God, help!” It’s funny—everyone prays. I think everyone feels like it’s a good habit with some therapeutic benefit. But still we wonder: does it work, or is it pointless?”
Quote of the Week
015 years
Here is my quote of the week. I am going to try to do these regularly if I can remember. It comes from Chapter 3 of my book on the subject of the Bible:
“…But there’s still that other trait I mentioned, my old habit of giving up. It’s not one of my finer qualities. There are days when it’s just easier to give up than to go through the difficult process of forcing myself to wrap my mind around something unfamiliar or something I don’t like. Giving up doesn’t build my character or improve my quality of life. It has often gotten me off track, keeping better from becoming best or preventing good from growing into great. I know I’ve robbed myself of hope, contentment, and opportunity many times by giving up.”
